A Harvard professor once taught me to complain about everything. He theorized that if we complained about everything, people would work harder to deliver better service.

After some more experience in the field, I have come to learn that he was only partially correct. It is true, that complaining can help you get what you want, but the opposite could also be true; complaining could have a negative affect.

So after many years of practicing and tweaking my approach, I’ve learned that a complaint by it self is useless. In practice, the best way to complain is to take the time to complain right.

By this I mean actually taking time to understand the issue, the possible factors at play, the actual players involved and then, having taken all that in to consideration; think what you would’ve done differently. Once you devise a strategy that you think works, speak to the person in charge and explain to them your circumstances and what you came up with.

But the trick here is not to complain to them… not actually. Rather, try to talk to them and solicit their feedback. Make it a two-way conversation. Not a bitch-session, not an-angry-customer-yelling-at-the-manager-session; simply, two people having a meaningful and beneficial conversation.

Your goal should be to befriend the Manager… to learn their perspective and their views, as well as share yours. A Manager that really cares and has the ability to do something about the situation, will work with you and do what is right. Others will just go along with you, thinking that their path of least resistance is to just listen because ‘the customer is always right’.

Based on your ’sit-down’, decide whether they have earned your business and whether you will visit again. But also leave knowing that you did the right thing and you helped them become better. Whether they take you up on your genoristy is up to them.